Bizarre calls to Technical Support

Support: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one…


Support: Click on the ‘my computer’ icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?


Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says ‘Can’t find printer’. I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can’t find it..


Support: What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.


Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Support: Are you sure it’s plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.
Support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK
Support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in.


Customer: I can’t get on the Internet.
Support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I’m sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five dots.


Support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Support: That’s not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry… Internet Explorer..


Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.


Support: How may I help you?
Customer: I’m writing my first email.
Support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the little circle around it?


This one is my favourite:

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.

Support: Are you running it under windows?

Customer: ‘No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good
point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window,
and his printer is working fine.’

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Author: charuzu

I live in Sydney and interests include music, piano playing, technology, cooking, English language, public speaking, Toastmasters, Asian culture (especially Japan and Korea), cinema, personal development, productivity and making friends with people from around the world.

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